Sunday, May 14, 2017

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day! I love reflecting on all the women who have been examples to me in my life. We need each other so much.

had this weekend off and that's always the best. We went on a family bike ride together on Saturday for the first time since Bennett was born. He did great in the trailer and it was a beautiful day! There are some food trucks that come to a little store near our house every Saturday, so it's the perfect ride for lunch. I don't know if a family bike ride to get tacos can be beat. He also made it home by 6:30 a couple times this week and that felt like such a treat! We love when we can eat dinner with daddy. He made breakfast on Mother's Day with Westin (kind of with Westin -- he's a distracted assistant) and we had fun watching a new funny show together on Saturday night. I love laughing with him. Sometimes he sends me before and after pictures of the things he does at work and I'm still just amazed that he knows how to stitch people up like that. The filter on my vacuum broke and he stitched it back up with serious precision. Not the same thing, but, you know. Still impressive.

had a letter to the editor published this week. I wrote it after receiving a mailer from my doctor that said, "Just because you're a mom doesn't mean you have to look like one." I was blown away when I read that and just could not stop staring at it. If I could have added to my letter (200 words limits are rough) I would have explained more fully that I was disappointed in the phrasing of that mailer and the fact that it came from my doctor, not disappointed in women choosing to do those things. That's another conversation entirely. The full letter is at the bottom of this post. Also, this week I was so incredibly grateful for friends. I rarely make plans that are dependent on Michael being home in time for something because I've learned that usually just sets me up for disappointment, but this past Friday I really wanted to go to a High Fitness Mother's Day party. I just finished my 4-week program to help diastasis recti, which means I could finally go back to regular exercise as of Friday. I made plans to go with my friend, and I was so excited. When Friday rolled around, Michael let me know that it was crazy at work and there was no way he could be home in time. I was disappointed but didn't want to dwell on it since it was out of my hands, but when I cancelled on my friend she told me that she and her husband would be over in a minute to watch my boys while I went. I tried to say no because I knew that meant giving up their Friday night, but she said "We're going to show up soon, so if you don't get on board this is going to be awkward..." and then they were at my house. It was so incredibly kind. I cried on my way to my class because I just didn't even fully realize how much I had been looking forward to getting out, and exercising again, and doing something fun without my kids (even though I love them very much...). I am still blown away by how kind that was. She had even already watched my kids that morning so that I could accompany a musical number at a funeral. I was just so grateful that day, a day like that during residency would be impossible without friends.

is obsessed with Cafe Rio quesadillas and, I mean, we're all a little obsessed with Cafe Rio. He was excited when we went there for dinner this last week. Michael had to go to a dinner for work the day after he had been on call, so we always need to do something happy during those long stretches without daddy. We have a sweet angel who has sent us some residency care packages that have meant the world to us, and a Cafe Rio gift card cheered us up so much that day. He's obsessed with coloring right now and loves some new bath crayons and a new coloring book, and play dough time is the way I get anything done these days. Westin says "Tell me a story" many, many times a day. And typically that only means tell him the story about when a harbor seal almost bit daddy when he was kayaking. It really is a great story, guys. If you haven't heard it, you need to.

is too big. I want him to stay small much more than I ever remember wanting to freeze time with Westin. It's just true that you know how much faster things go the second time around. He's on a solid routine and I love that, it's nice that he's pretty predictable because I feel like I can make plans more easily that way. But whenever a routine feels solid with a baby, usually something will change soon! He loves trying new foods still -- this week he added smoothies, beans, sweet potatoes, and watermelon to the mix. He officially stopped sleeping in his swaddle sack on Saturday and I'm so happy about that. I had tried before and he did ok with naps, but never good at night time, so I kept going back. But we tried again and this time I'm not going back. He loved riding in the bike trailer and the cart next to Westin. Like, so much. It's so sweet to watch him smile at his older brother.

These boys make me feel so much big love.

One blinking. Then one picking his nose. We get what we get.

This sweet, busy man made Mother's Day weekend so much fun around here. I'm so grateful for him.

When we make the turn into our neighborhood we always hear a little voice back there say, "Hey, I need to drive!"

I love these boys. Michael snapped this picture during some backyard time and Bennet is just looking so big these days.

Westin is obsessed with some new bath crayons.

Michael made me a chocolate chip protein pancake breakfast for Mother's Day :)
Westin got the "O" of "MOM" and I poured some maple syrup in the middle for him to dip his pancake in. The next thing I knew, he had licked the syrup from the middle completely, and was asking for seconds. Of just syrup.

Bennett's first time riding in the cart by his big brother! This is going to make my life so much easier.

Little buddy.

And his first time riding in the bike trailer that same day. Such a big boy!

We have missed family bike rides sooo much.

The flyer I received from my OB that I wrote about in my Letter to the Editor.

Reverse side.

Haircut time! He does a good job sitting still if I promise him he can spray me after.

From Instagram:

Seven months of Bennett came and went last week, and he seems like even more of a sweetie these days!
No signs of stranger danger at all, just soaks up love and attention in all forms. He has the saddest little cry when I leave the room, though. Westin has noticed that it's fun to go make him happy in these moments, and I love hearing "It's ok baby Bennett, mama will be right back." Bennett has two teeth, likes trying new food, has started scooting backwards when he's on his belly, rolls a little, goes to sleep like a champ but still eats once or twice at night, loves holding all the crackly things, wants to be part of the party, and gave me his first big, slobbery kiss yesterday. I melted and I love him so much.

The health challenge continues... I had to snap a pic of this lunchtime scene because believe me, it has never looked this colorful before.

Bennett rolls constantly now, never to get from point A to point B but rolls in the same spot wherever he is. He cracked me up in this bouncer seat while I was getting ready, just lounging.

I love stumbling onto little examples of Westin's play.

Every time we change Westin's clothes he says he wants "doggy ears" which means to not pull his shirt all the way off so he can walk around and bark while the sleeves hang down like ears. He came and found me while I was watching The Voice. I love that sweet little boy.

I have been and continue to be surrounded by incredible women in my life,
and their examples are treasures to me. Here are a few who have been on my mind today:
I think about my Grandma Eliason so, so often. She helps me mother my children. Her example and her presence has gotten me through some low points in my life.

My Miner women make me so happy to be around. They are beautiful inside and out. My mom has mothered me through different stages of life and watching her be my children's grandma is so much fun. Jenny has taught me so much about motherhood as I've watched her raise my sweet nieces and nephews. Ali raises my kids with me every single day on FaceTime and thank goodness for that.

There isn't a single time I play the piano that I don't think about my Grandma Miner. Before any performance, like when I played for my friend singing at a funeral this week, I pray that I can just contribute to the Spirit of a meeting with the music, not distract from the Spirit of the meeting with any mistakes, and I ask if my Grandmas can please be near me. I never feel closer to Grandma Miner than in those moments. 
My Mother-In-Law has taught me so much in the recent years that I've known her. I am incredibly grateful to have married into the family that I did. Her example means so much to me and I'm grateful my kids have the grandparents they do.

Michael has such awesome sisters. I love learning from them and laughing with them. I always look forward to the times we get to spend together so much.

The Fresno Bee | May 12, 2017
This week I received a mailer from my obstetrician-gynecologist, who recently delivered my second baby. It was a Mother’s Day promotion, but it wasn’t celebrating motherhood.
The heading read, “Just because you’re a mom doesn’t mean you have to look like one.”
The reverse side detailed a “Mother’s Day Special Event” with Botox, facelifts, lip plumping and various treatments to apparently keep me from looking like the mom I am proud to be.
At seven months’ postpartum, this felt like a blatant slap in the face. My “provider” – of medical care, concern and advice – sent me a discount on “services” to meet impossible social standards that he is unabashedly capitalizing on.
To use Mother’s Day as a marketing opportunity to add to the chorus of voices telling us our motherhood is somehow a flaw is tasteless from anyone, but from my medical provider, it’s unconscionable.
New moms are undoubtedly one of the most vulnerable patient populations. I was disgusted by the way Dr. Wade Dickinson’s office took advantage of this in the name of celebrating women.
I’m proud to be a mom and look like a mom. Even if my doctor deems that as something he can fix.

1 comment:

  1. Maddie you are my hero with that letter! It's so true that mom's have such a hard time after having children to "bounce back" and look just as good as before we became mother's. We aren't any less attractive after children, our attractiveness changes from what our bodies look like to what they can do. Sure my hips are wider, makes it easier to hold a kid while cooking. I'm so glad that you understand that motherhood doesn't make us ugly or unattractive, it just brings out a different kind of beauty. You go girl!


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