My Current Perspective: Women & the Priesthood

I'm about to get personal up in here: let's talk about women and the Priesthood in the LDS Church. I have finally seen a written viewpoint that most closely (not 100%) aligns with my own opinion. The writer laid out her thoughts in these points:

1. Feminist is not a dirty word.
2. Equality is not "sameness."
3. The Church culture sometimes (unintentionally) fosters pervasive behaviors and attitudes that discriminate against women or make them feel inferior.
4. The strength of a person's testimony in the Gospel of Jesus Christ is not tied to the amount of questions they ask or the amount of practices they question, and
5. It's not really anyone else's place to judge another person's testimony or their fate for the experiences they've had, the questions the raise, or the desires of their heart.

And if you don't make it to the end of that blog post (which I really hope you do), at least read this sentence from the conclusion:

"Here is where I will admit that I am not a champion of the Ordain Women movement. But, I do not condemn these men and women asking for women to have the Priesthood as apostates and people without an understanding of the Gospel...Do I think that the Church will give women the Priesthood in this life? I think it's possible. I don't think the Church will do it as a direct answer to the Ordain Women movement. But I also don't think the Church would ever do it if no one asked the question."

I posted these thoughts on Facebook today, so you can join the conversation there, or have it with me here. It's something I've been thinking a lot about and feeling a lot about lately. There have been multiple comments said (or posted) about this sensitive topic that I haven't responded to in the moment, and I've regretted it. Sometimes I let my heart get too involved with what my head is hearing or thinking, and I lose trust in my abilities. Ability to be calm, to convey, to understand, to trust. So then I just turn those thoughts over and over and over in my head. I build them but I keep them. They are mine, and they are vulnerable. But if I keep them forever, they are lost. So I'm sharing them today, with full awareness that I'm constantly refining this opinionated heart and soul of mine.

So. Here is my bottom line: Conversations deserve an open mind, and people deserve love.

To Brighten Your Day

Flight of the Conchords. Have you heard of them?

You maybe either... 

a) think I'm crazy for even asking that question because "everyone loves them", or 

b) shook your head no, or 

c) none of the above because you are just kind of mindlessly blog reading through your list of blogs you mindlessly read. I get that. 

But let's talk about these guys.

Nutshell: New Zealand comedy duo, Bret McKenzie and Jemaine Clement. 

Bigger nutshell: Coming at you straight from Wikipedia, life's resource: "The duo's comedy and music became the basis of a BBC radio series, then an American television series, called Flight of the Concords. They used to refer to themselves as 'New Zealand's 4th most popular guitar-based digi-bongo acapella-rap-funk-comedy folk duo', however now they are 'the almost award-winning fourth-most-popular folk duo in New Zealand.'" Bret McKenzie was the music supervisor for the most recent Muppets movie, and won the Academy Award for best original song. (And you know those Muppets will forever be in my heart.)

Now, this is not a full endorsement of everything that Flight of the Conchords offers the world. This is a statement that they are insanely clever and hilarious and talented, and the following video is the best thing I've seen produced on the Internets in a long, long time. Let's just get right to it.

That song has been in my head since I first saw this. Those kids, you guys. They are so perfect. I have probably 23 favorite parts of that video so we'll just leave it at - I love it. 

Color

"Mere color, unspoiled by meaning, and unallied with definite form, 

can speak to the soul in a thousand different ways."

-Oscar Wilde

Oh how I believe that. I am obsessed with color lately, and wanting as much of it in my life as possible. On my walls or on my plate, wearing them or just seeing them around me. And let me tell you, my apartment has plenty of opportunities to add color to it, considering it's mostly still a white-walled wonder. 

So even though I got a 16 on THIS TEST, I still moved forward with coral bathroom plans in full confidence. That's what happens when Michael has to stay at school from 7am to 11pm. I find ways to entertain myself - and color our apartment.

You should take the test. Leave your score in the comments - maybe it will help me feel better about mine.

(Which, on my slightly bitter retake, was 12.)

Power[ful]

I've been thinking a lot about the word power lately. Have you ever looked at how widely that word is used, in all kinds of ways? You hear about all sorts of types. The power of your thoughts. Power to do good. The power of God. Girl power. Power power power. The more you think about a word, the weirder it sounds. Power.

But that's not the point. The point is, my life has had some ups and downs lately that have been primarily determined by outside factors. Some potential changes, some real changes. Some learning curves, some figuring out of feelings. Was all of that vague enough for you? Good. The point is, I've been paying attention to what makes me feel powerless, and what makes me feel powerful.

Exhibit A: Powerless.

Dang it, right? Just one of those bummers in life. Those flashing lights and the waiting game just make you feel small... like you've been snatched out of your day that was moving right along (too quickly) and suddenly you are at someone else's mercy. And you're sitting there, doing some math in your head about what part of your budget is paying for this Ticket to Ride, and you just kind of deflate. In that moment, I feel like I have very little power. (But in the moment the cop told me his computer wasn't working, so it was my lucky day and I wasn't getting a ticket, I definitely perked up a little.) In moments when outside factors throw me curve balls, I sometimes let myself feel powerless. But then there is...

Exhibit B: Powerful.

Check out this darling little girl. This is my "Little Sister", and that right there is power. She almost looks ready for the Hunger Games. We spent our Saturday at Hidden River Farms a couple weeks ago, playing ladder ball and cornhole, taking hay rides, having a barbecue, and yep, even practicing some archery. She was a natural. My triceps almost couldn't get me through my 10 arrows. (That's an entirely different type of powerless...but, oh how I sometimes feel that one, too.)

We also spent some time that day doing a service project with all the other Bigs and Littles that were there. We cut and decorated fleece super hero capes for Riley Children's Hospital, so the sweet kids there can wear them during their battles.

When we were done decorating our (leopard print and polka dot) capes, my Little Sister said, "I bet a kid will be so excited to get this cape. They're going to feel so strong. Like they can just fight stuff. Like cancer."

They're going to feel powerful.

That day was a good day. It was one of those days when outside factors just have nothing on you, you know? Partly because we just had so much fun - we fed catfish and saw snakes and ate really big cookies. But mostly, it's because days like that make you feel the true kind of powerful. To me, feeling powerful is a paradox - you get that feeling when you relinquish control, and give more of yourself to others. That is the best kind of accomplishment, and you feel empowered to do more, be more, give more.

This little girl felt powerful that day because she spent time serving other kids. Kids that she'll never even meet. And I felt powerful that day because I watched her love that feeling, and I felt it myself from just being there with her when I could have made myself busy with a million other less important things. I hope she always knows and remembers how powerful she is, and that she is in charge of what her life becomes. I hope she remembers that service is empowering. Mostly, I just hope that she grows up truly knowing who she is and how much self-worth she has. That alone should keep all of us feeling strong, and capable. And powerful.

Celebrating 25

We had a birthday weekend over here. It was perfect weather (September is the best month, have I told you that lately?), and we had such a fun Saturday. Michael made me a wonderful crepe breakfast and creatively presented my presents. Pretty good, huh?

 

Do you see that laptop? (Not a present. Had that for a couple years now.) I'm talking about what's ON the laptop.....Wicked!! That was our birthday splurge, funded by our four-dog weekend and a 3am verbatim (which is dental school speak for getting paid to type up a class) by Michael. Work hard, play hard, people. I am way too excited to see Wicked again. This will be my fifth time, but Michael's first! Which has me excited enough for the both of us. Which is necessary, because I don't know if Michael is too excited? He's a good sport. Especially when I make him listen to the entire Wicked soundtrack with me on our long drives whenever I need to stay awake.

Living far away from my family is a bummer, but mail is not! Sweet, sweet people sent me birthday wishes from states away, and it was so nice of them. My sister even sent me a purple shirt, which is maybe the fourth purple clothing item I've owned in my life. I never wear purple? So she's helping me break my weird habits. I wore it yesterday, mind you. And yes, those are packages of Reeses and Oreos there in the corner that Michael wrapped up for my birthday. He's a smart husband.

When Michael asked me what I wanted to do for my birthday, I just said snow cones and bikes. I wish we lived closer to the Monon Trail, it's kind of pain to drive our bikes up to Broad Ripple for a ride. But when we do, I am in love with the whole day. So we got a Pink Lemon Sour (her) and Black Cherry (him) shaved ice, then hit the trail. It was such a beautiful day!

   

Michael made me practice relay handoffs with a stick the whole time. We got pretty good at it. Well, kind of just him. I'm a wimp on a bike, let's be honest.

 

After we finished our bike ride we hurried down south to meet Michael's parents for dinner. They stayed in Indianapolis that night on their way to bike ride in Michigan. We ate delicious Thai food with them and had fun catching up. They are so nice. We love living close to them during dental school.

Then Sunday came and it was the laziest of days. Normally our church is 3 hours, but due to some scheduling conflicts with other congregations, we only met from 10am-12pm that day. It somehow turned the whole day into a holiday...a lazy holiday.

This little cat calms my soul sometimes - I had a little anxiety about turning 25. I know, I know...you are all rolling your eyes and saying "That is so young!" And I know it is. But for some reason, it was the first age that I wasn't excited to turn. It rounds to 30. It means that I'm getting older which means my family is getting older which means life is changing which means there are different stages of life to get used to...and, it just all felt weird. Growing up is one thing. Watching families grow up and lives change is another.

But, I can rent a car now. Gotta focus on the positives of this new age of mine. And I have a feeling there are plenty of other good things waiting for me in 25. I just need a little direction and time to figure out what those things are. All in all, it was a perfect birthday, and all day I just felt grateful for how blessed my last 25 years have been. I have had a lot of treasured experiences and treasured relationships in a short time.

I really do love life.

-----

We're going to leave you with a product placement here today. I get paid big bucks for these promos. (False.)

Have you ever tried this chapstick from Bath & Body Works? I am full blown addicted to it. Not the bad kind of addicted, where they're putting something in it that makes your lips all dependent and weird when you can't find it in time...just the full on, could-quit-anytime-but-don't-want-to, healthy addicted. It's the best. And for three months they have been sold out in stores and online, which was conveniently when I completely ran out.... but it's back, people! Did you already get your year supply? No? Just me? Well, don't come to me when it's sold out again.

Also, last week my Excedrin looked like a flower, and it was the most pleasant medicine-taking experience I've ever had. So I had to show you. Kind of cool? Ok, maybe not, but in the moment I was pretty impressed.

Ok, that's all. Happy birthday to me! And to you, hopefully in September, because it really is the best month, you guys.... Ok, I'll stop with that.

Life Lately: In Random Mode

I don't know what your September is like, but ours kind of looks like a tornado hit our calendar. But I'm ok with this, because September is the best month of the year. September means that summer's heat is out the door, and I get to be surrounded by scarves and crunchy leaves and apple cider. There is no transition more fun for me than summer into fall. So bring on the busy month, because it's just full of good, good stuff! And here are a few random updates to catch you up on our life over here in our little corner of Indianapolis.

Dogs. We have been going out of town so much lately that we decided to just have a relaxing Labor Day weekend. Somehow relaxing turned into watching four dogs, two of whom could very well kill me on accident and maybe not even know it happened. LOOK at these guys! They're called mastiffs. I call them small horses. I was not a lot of help when we went over to check on these pups...in fact, I actually screamed a few times and stood in corner a few more times, while Michael thoroughly enjoyed himself. They are huge animals, you guys. And they act like puppies - meaning they love to run at you and jump at you, making them as tall as Michael. Yikesies.

The other two dogs, of much smaller proportions, lived with us for the weekend. Do you know I've had the same Christmas dream for all (soon to be 25) years of my life? I have pictured a tiny sweet brown puppy with a big red bow around its neck under my Christmas tree for as long as I can remember. And THAT sweet little puppy on the left is exactly from my dreams! Watching her was kind of a last minute deal, but we couldn't refuse a golden retriever puppy. I mean look at that face....could you? And this is no offense to the wrinkly guy on the right...he's a good dog too. I've just, never had Christmas dreams quite that wrinkly, if you know what I mean.

So four dogs for Labor Day, sounds like a good idea, right? Actually no, it doesn't even sound like a good idea. We were so blind-sided by puppy dog eyes. But we made it through the weekend and promptly deleted our dog-sitting profile online because, oh my goodness. What a weekend that was. We're ready for a break. 

(And a little brown puppy!) 

(But we're not allowed to have pets.) 

(I hope my manager doesn't read my blog.)

We did make a quick trip to Louisville on Saturday, to go to the temple and to see Michael's parents. We wish we could have spent more time with them (again, four dogs? bad idea), but hopefully we will soon.

These guys went home on Monday, and our life got significantly less hairy. They really were a lot of fun. 

But sometimes they were not. 

Later that night we walked around downtown with the Naylors. Those little kiddos are so much fun. We love being with them. And look at that sky! It was such a beautiful day. We ended it with dinner at one of our favorites here, and then finished up the last episodes of Parks and Rec. Yep, all of them. We're done, and we're sad about it. 

And then I tried to start my normal work week but my throat and stomach and head said, no that's ok, we'll just stay in bed, thanks. So I worked from home Tuesday and Wednesday and spent my nights finishing the last season of Parenthood. Yep, all of it. I'm done, and I'm sad about it.

Also, a little embarrassed by those TV confessions. They're the only shows we watch, promise. And by we, I'm not talking about Parenthood, because Michael kind of twitches when he hears me turn that on and it's only watched when he's studying. I don't really blame him...why do I like watching other people's drama? And crying in every single episode? It's beyond me. I just know I keep coming back for more. And I had a dream I was a member of the Braverman family, and that was a little much.

Finally, football time. We had college gear day at work and I rocked my BYU shirt. I was the only one supporting BYU in my office? Weird. I love this picture from the @byucougars Instagram. BYU is just the coolest. I miss that place so, so much. Go Cougars! :)

That's life lately...with good things in our future [birthdays, picnics, regattas (for real), book clubs, girls' nights, cooking classes, orchard visits, warm sweaters....] 

Oh September. You really are the best.

Nauvoo with Texans

Our summer has been full of family and full of road trips - just like a summer should be. Michael's sister Pam drove up from Texas with her fun family, and they invited us to meet them in Nauvoo. We were so excited to see them - Houston is too far away!

We had a crazy week, so we ended up not being able to start on our 5 hour drive until about 7 on Thursday night. And then we had the craziest late night drive. These pictures are all bad and blurry - but I had to document the series of strange events. It started when our gaslight came on (such a frequent occurrence...so depressing), so we started searching for a gas station. We finally found one - and it didn't accept credit cards. At all? We finally found another - and when I scanned my credit card it just flashed this message at me: "No one can pay now. No one can pay now." ?? Then we found a third gas station, and when Michael scanned his credit card it told him to go inside and pay the clerk - but inside was pitch black, empty and locked. We were getting desperate. 

Finally we had to cross the Mississippi and head into Iowa, hoping for a cooperative gas station. Our fourth try finally filled our tank. But then my phone took us some crazy way out of town, which involved driving on an abandoned road that led to a prison, crossing a $2 toll bridge run by a sweet old lady that was right by the prison (I wanted her to get in the car with us and leave that place). Then, we stopped so we wouldn't hit that deer. Then, we stopped so we wouldn't hit that fox. Then, we drove through cornfields and cornfields and suddenly our hotel appeared, kind of in the middle of no where. It was creepy. And add to all that the fact that we had our windows down and music loud and we were pulling out all the stops to stay awake because we were so completely exhausted - holy moly Nauvoo, we barely made it to you.

But the next morning we woke up to these little kiddos! Three nephews and a niece that live way too far away. We had such a good time with them.

Nauvoo is so great. I had only been there once before, with one of my BYU classes in a long ago November. We froze our way through a couple days there, and just loved it. This time the weather was completely perfect.

There are plenty of missionaries around Nauvoo to show you a good time. We went on a carriage ride with horses, a wagon ride with oxen, learned how to make barrels and rope and bread and candles, went to an old schoolhouse and printing press... it's the best.

They let us keep the rope that we made, and this is what ended up happening....Gary loved it. 

The Nauvoo temple is almost always in view, up on a hill over the city. It's beautiful. Michael's sister was married there ten years ago.

We went to walk around the temple grounds that night and took some pictures. I asked little Ben if he was going to get married in that temple, and he said, "No...not this temple. I want to get married in the cookie temple." I'm definitely going to his wedding.

We didn't have time to go inside the temple on this trip, but we'll definitely make our way out there again while we're in Indiana. I think it's such a beautiful place.

We took the kiddos to an old cemetery on Saturday morning, and had fun seeing who could find the oldest grave. We found the headstone of Seymour Brunson - Joseph Smith spoke at his funeral, and it was there that the Prophet introduced the doctrine of Baptism for the Dead. The whole weekend I was just wishing that Susan Black was walking around with us...she is an incredible church history teacher at BYU with a memory like no other. I wish I took her class 10 times.

Speaking of Ben and cookies. We ate a few cookies before leaving our hotel to see a show that night, and ran around outside beforehand to get some energy out. We noticed Ben was still hanging on to his cookie, and when we asked him why, he said "I'm just needing milk." This is a kid after my own heart. We finally convinced him to eat the cookie sans milk before the show, but I completely understand where he's coming from here. Doesn't he look so sad there on the right? Realizing his cookie had to be solo? Poor guy.

This is where they used to have church in Nauvoo. I could totally get on board with that - sunshine and trees during meetings. 

On our way out of town we went to Carthage, where Joseph Smith and his brother Hyrum were killed. The missionaries there do a wonderful job of teaching you about the final days of Joseph Smith's life, and bearing their testimonies of the Gospel that he restored.

Pam's family drove to Indianapolis after Nauvoo, and spent Sunday here with us. They thoroughly entertained us during church, and then we went on a Sunday stroll down the canal. At one point little Gary was feeding three geese from his hands that were the same height as him...and loving it, of course. Ben fell asleep on the way there and was pretty unimpressed with us waking him up for the experience. But he came around.

It's so fun to have family visit and see where you live. It somehow makes homes feel more homey when family has been there. Thanks for visiting, Walkers!