Sunday, December 29, 2019

Merry Christmas!


I can't believe this week had Christmas in it. Somehow Christmas feels so long ago already. I don't understand how that works. So much build up all through December, then it's over and we put everything away yesterday. BUT it was a good Christmas!!

On Monday I did a Wal-Mart pick up and a free Costco delivery, which finished up my December of seriously avoiding all stores. There's just no other way to do it with three little kiddos. I credit so much of my Christmas spirit to the fact that I avoided the crowds and the hustle!

On Tuesday, Christmas Eve, Michael had the day off. We had planned on going up to the mountain to let Westin build a snowman. Our recent Bishop called us Monday night and told us we should come up to his cabin that next day. That was so nice of him and we were so happy to have a warm and cozy home base while Westin and Bennett got their fill of snow! We were with Bishop Lawrence and his boys for a couple hours, then stayed up there a couple hours longer before heading back down the mountain. It's really amazing that you can be to Shaver Lake in a 45 minute drive from Fresno. We had snowball fights, built a snowman, did a little sledding, played around, warmed up when we needed to in the cabin, brought up a picnic, and just had a white Christmas Eve together. That night we had our traditional salmon and shrimp dinner, and exchanged presents that we picked out for each other. Westin got Bennett a cement truck since he knows that Bennett loves his. Bennett got Westin a little dentist alligator game, and it took me back to our childhood road trip to Yellowstone when my family got the exact same one. Westin picked out some local orange blossom honey for Michael, and I got him a couple's journal and a parenting audio course from a teacher I love to learn from. He got me some Clean Simple Eats recipe books that I really wanted, and some earrings. We got the boys each a Christmas book that night. Then we had cocoa and toast and watched the new nativity movie again, and did our Christmas ornament for the night from our 25 Days of Christ box. I love Christmas Eve!

The next morning we all slept in... what! Westin was up earlier than us but we had chairs in the hallway to make sure we all went to the tree together. Those were for Bennett though, because Westin would never go to the tree without us if we told him not to. Bennett is still figuring this Christmas thing out! So Westin was drawing pictures while all of us slept in and I'm just in shock still at his patience and sweetness. We didn't make our way to the tree until about 8, and took a break from opening presents for a late breakfast (cinnamon rolls and breakfast casserole), and finished opening presents around 11:30. Such a fun, drawn out Christmas morning. We facetimed some family, went on a walk, watched Elf while we ate snacks, played with new toys and games, had a tri tip dinner, and just had fun with each other. Such a better Christmas than last year. Christmas ended with hearing a sad experience that made me SO grateful for my family. I don't want to go into that but I DO want to remember how much gratitude I felt for my people and our home and our life.

Michael worked until about 4pm the next day, and our friends Emily and Jordan had invited us to a fun dinner theater where we ate together then watched Elf the Musical. Dessert was during intermission and it was just a fun night with good friends and so nice of them to invite us. Sweet Camden has officially forgotten how to take a bottle because he hasn't had one since the first week of October... my fault for being lazy about that. So, he had a hard night crying himself to sleep while the babysitter was here and then uncharacteristically cried himself to sleep all naps and nights after that... PTSD? I felt so bad. But also just really needed a night out and fed him right before I left and right when I got home almost 5 hours later so I knew he'd be ok. Just not super happy. Now I'm feeling a little more stuck than I was feeling prior to learning that he won't take a bottle.

The next day Michael only had to round so he was home by 9am. We went on a walk all together and tried out the boys' new bikes a little bit. They are a lot bigger than their little balance bikes and they're not too sure about them. 

On Saturday we put away all of our Christmas stuff and had the house looking fresh again. It's crazy how empty your old normal feels once Christmas is away. I went to the temple for just a short visit since I don't think I can do a long visit now that Camden won't take a bottle. When I got home we all went to a family arcade center and did an awesome mystery shop. Basically we had go carts, laser tag, some kid rides, and batting cages, plus more arcade tokens than we could ever want, plus dinner, and made $50 off all of it. The boys had a lot of fun. And it was so fun (but also some serious mixed messages) to let them just try any arcade game they wanted as many times as they wanted. I'm always saying no to them when they want to try those claw things that can pick up a toy, but suddenly I was letting Westin try as many times as his heart desires and I could tell this did not match up in his brain with our normal, haha. We tried to explain mystery shopping to him and he seemed to kind of understand, but who knows.

Then Sunday was our last day of later church, Bennett's last day of nursery (!), our first day using our new air fryer from Shelley's family (falafel!) and a day full of trying to learn how to let brothers be brothers and not constantly quiet their noise and wrestling. Constant struggle for me. We Facetimed both our parents as well. It was a good Christmas week! But I can't help feel just so ready for New Years and new starts and 2020. Oh we've had our eye on 2020 for quite some time. Here we go!

Westin wanted a Christmassy breakfast on Monday so this was a quick fix. This kid and fun food. 


Bennett came to me with his pants around his neck to tell me he was done going potty.
He's just always being so silly and we love this cutie so much.

Bennett took a good Christmassy nap on Monday!

I went in to get him up and he immediately woke up, waved and smiled at me, and then...

Was immediately back to sleep. This is not even pretend. #angel
Then I had to wake him up for real, haha.

Finding our winter wonderland for the day!


We had to dig up snow clothes from deep within our house before this little trip.
We have turned into fair weather Californians! 


Westin and Bennett loved this ride.










Michael put our pistachio shells to good use.




Once Bennett found out you can eat snow...

it was game over. 
This game takes me back!



Cinnamon rolls and breakfast casserole in the fridge while Michael built bikes.

A sweet older man in my ward growing up used to bring us these for Christmas, each our own.
And we loved waking up and choosing a new fun cereal each day for a few days.
I decided to put them in my kids stocking even though they'll never know Brother Hepworth
and they don't even know yet that I put them there, but I liked seeing them think these were so exciting.

Santa! I know him!

Ready for those cute boys.


Clayton gave them dino finger pets and they love them!

That Christmas morning chaos. It's such a distinct feeling.

First time in the Lego world! Graduating from Duplos, though it stresses me out.

Snacks and Elf with my little fam.

Christmas Card 2019

Christmas Card 2019

We've watched dogs for soo many nights this month.

Happy little bumbo baby!

Ready to ride!

They were so cute on this together.


Bennett...

Matching ties from Christmas!

Sunday, December 22, 2019

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year

We filled up our week with some Christmas traditions!
Four batches of toffee, decorating gingerbread with friends, gingerbread houses at Westin's classroom (I was so happy to be able to go! One of our favorite babysitters is home from BYU for Christmas, so she watched Camden and Bennett while I was with Westin), driving around looking at lights, driving through the live nativity/Bethlehem set up at a nearby church, Christmas sacrament meeting with cinnamon rolls after, Christmas movies and books, one-on-one dates with the boys so they could buy a present for each other to exchange on Christmas Eve, present wrapping, treat drop offs, finished up some cross stitches, and finished each day with our 25 Days of Christ ornaments/book. I am so excited for Christmas with the boys! Last Christmas was hard with Michael's schedule and pregnancy nausea. I don't think I would've made it through Christmas Eve without Becca! We spent Christmas Eve together states apart as we just pushed each other through getting things done that day. Michael has two days off this week and I'm so excited.

Some favorite moments with each person this week:
When Bennett tells the dogs we watch "I love you, heh heh!"
(Heh heh is him sticking out his tongue and panting like a dog,
which is the name he calls all dogs. Like how he calls Kitty 'meow meow'".)
Watching Westin have so much fun with his ward friends decorating gingerbread cookies.
Smelling my house after baking those gingerbread cookies.
Going out for dumplings all together on Saturday night and watching the boys try to use chopsticks and figure out how to eat edamame. They were so cute.
When Westin walked by the pile of boxes (of Christmas presents that need to be wrapped) that had been there for maybe two weeks and said, "Whoa! That's a big pile of boxes!" like he had never seen them before haha.
Listening to Westin sing Rockin Around the Christmas tree ... "You will get a santa-little feeling, when you hear... voices singing let's be golly, deh da duh duh (mumbles away the last part because he has no idea what it says). Such a cutie.

This week felt like one of those times when you realize how much work it takes to play,
but I feel like we have had a really fun Christmas season and I'm so excited for this week. The last couple years I have felt a little bit of dread when the holidays came closer because of the work it takes to be intentional with all the parts of Christmas. But this year it came together so much better than the last couple years. I think a big part of it was doing free Amazon and Shipt trials plus my first Instacart order, so I seriously have not dragged my kids around any stores this whole season. I get drained so fast when I am out in holiday crowds and we really have accomplished quite a bit without setting foot in any stores.

I am grateful for this time of year to teach my kids even more about their Savior who loves them!
We're ready for Christmas!

Tonight I just sat with this view:



and listened to this song on repeat (thanks Becca), and this one too, and just sat with the feeling that change is coming. This has been such a sweet and simple Christmas season. This little tree by me, this home we're in. We've grown so much here these last few years. Soon we'll know what our next is. These are our last few weeks being fully in this stage without being lost in the next transition. And I can't help but mourn the sweetness of this little stage. Tiny people. Simple life. So much work for both Michael and for me, but just good, good efforts from both of us to build a good foundation for our family. Oh this little Christmas. I know I'm going to remember it forever. Christmas also has me a little inexplicably sad this season and I think that's because we are all homesick for heaven. And we can just feel that a little bit more during these days of being closer to Christ. I love my family so much. I love my Savior. I love the moments when I feel like I am close to Him and living life in the way that will help my kids get back to Him. I don't want Christmas to end this year. There is just so much happening on the other side of it. But I know there are things working together for our good, and everything will work out in the right way.

I am just weepy and wordy tonight.

Toffee time. He loved helping with this part.
Then he looked over at me mixing up the toffee on the stove and said,
"Whoa. That's a lot of butter."




It really helps to make your four batches of toffee when you really need to go to the grocery store.
I was quite pleased about this timing.

My kids love driving through "Bethlehem" and the live nativity at a nearby church.
This was the first year Michael was with us, so it's the first time we all got out after for the hot chocolate and cookies.
Everyone we met was so kind. I want to go to more community events and get out of our places of habit more.

Just reading at Christmas time. The best.

He hit 5 months this week! How!
He has rolled twice from stomach to back. Wakes up twice each night. Smiles SO much and is such a sweet, happy boy. Nurses so fast now and gets distracted by his brothers while eating, laughs when his brothers give him attention,
and is very content on our walks to take brother to school or pick him up.

They asked me to cut up a banana so they could have a picnic.
I'm not sure why it needed to be cut up for the picnic but they were being so cute,
so I decided to just cut up the banana.

My mom mailed me this picture of my family at Christmas time years ago.
I have it hung up by my Christmas cards right now and I love it so much.
It also makes me super nostalgic when I stop and look at it,
and makes me remember that time goes by so fast.

Brothers watching a Wild Kratts Christmas

Happy to be 5 months old!

Bennett loves this fleece that my friend Ami Bunker gave us years ago.
She gave it to me when Westin was 18 months old, even though it's a 3T fleece, and said,
"You're going to need this before you know it."
And now my second kid is wearing it. Blows my mind.


Westin tapes his kindergarten creations onto our hallway wall and I love it.

I found this note in the kitchen one day.
"Mom, I love you, I am sorry."
I don't even know what he's apologizing for. I thought it was the sweetest thing.

He chose what to write on the back of his teacher's Christmas cross stitches,
and I just helped him with the spelling.

He really really loves his teachers. So grateful he has such good ones!

Making gingerbread men.


Cookie decorating!




Ethan won for most decorated.
It was so fun watching them all be creative and just letting them go for it.

Bennett loves Luna!

I made two batches of dutch oven bread so that we could take one to a friend and experiment with one.
Michael put some herbs from his garden throughout this one plus some fresh parmesan cheese. It was delicious!
 He said, "Nothing's better than bread. It's better than any dessert there is."
It's probably true.

Everyone wants to help with Luna's walks!
Luna's family brought the boys that cute painted fish for Christmas when they dropped her off,
and Bennett carries it all around. So cute.

Michael's chief, Amit, from two years ago stopped by and he had fun seeing him!


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