Coming Up on 5

Michael:

had his first weekend home in over a month, after a some call weeks right in a row right before he was out of town for two weekends. So it felt nice to be all together and have a low key weekend! He was able to come to Westin's birthday party on Saturday. When I told Westin daddy would be at his party he said, "Wait, what? That's crazy! Are you serious?!" So cute. So sad. Coming back to work was extra painful for Michael this week because he is just feeling so ready to be done with residency. Getting close!

Maddie:

took two days to slowly recover from our trip, but I'm still so glad we went and met our potential practice spots and saw potential cities. I felt like such a mom this week with the birthday stuff going on -- especially bringing treats to Westin's class. I feel like I was just going to school. I am slowly checking things off my holiday to do list so we can have a December that's wide open for the things we actually enjoy and that actually matter. Such a tricky season. I am as tired now as I've been since Camden was born, and it's because I've gotten out of the habit of going to bed early. We just need to do that, but somehow I relearn that lesson constantly. If only I could feel as tired at 8pm as I feel at 8am, the problem would be solved. But oh when those kids go to bed, I suddenly just want to do all the things I can't ever do during the day. I was remembering this week that when we moved here we said, "When we finish residency, Westin will be 5." We couldn't even imagine what having a 5-year-old would be like. He wasn't even two. Such a little guy when we moved here, and Bennett was still growing in my belly. The four years felt like forever ahead of us, and suddenly we're in the last stretch with that little 5-year-old we talked about. Life moves fast, even though the week days often do not. I'm so grateful to be a mom, though. This is what I've always wanted.

Westin:

was the birthday boy this weekend! Oh he was thrilled about it. He went to a birthday party at Chuck E. Cheese last month and has not stopped talking about it. I offered to throw him a Wild Kratts birthday party at home like he'd been talking about. I gave him all sorts of options. But he was set on Chuck E. Cheese. So the three cute boys he goes to Sunday School with met us there on Saturday and the four of them plus Bennett (and Michael...) had SO much fun playing games and eating pizza and winning tickets. Oh man that place is sensory overload for me. And bringing home all those little random prizes plus the fun presents from his friends had me in #konmari mode all afternoon and I kept making secret trips to the trash can to clear out Westin and Bennett's random hoards of stuff they slowly develop. Westin loved writing notes to each of his friends and making them cookies for coming to his party. Then on Saturday night we got a babysitter for Bennett and Camden and let Westin choose where to go out for his birthday dinner with just mom and dad. We frequently drive by a Famous Dave's barbecue on our errands and Westin always laughs at the pig roasting hot dogs on the outside of the restaurant. So when he got to pick, he was set on "The pig place!" since he had never been. He was so happy with all the attention. Tonight we are doing his birthday dinner with the family (he chose salmon, corn on the cob, and caesar salad, with chocolate chip cookies to blow out candles -- kid after my own heart). Michael is giving him his walkie talkies he had when he was a kid for his birthday, and I think those two are going to have so much fun with that. I can't believe he'll be 5 soon! We also took donuts to his class this week since this coming week is Thanksgiving Break, and he loved that so much. Such a fun age.

Bennett:

has biiiiiig feelings these days. Oh to be 3. If Westin really wants to make Bennett mad these days he just says, "You're 2, Bennett." Which immediately riles Bennett up, who then responds with, "No, THREE, brudder!" Then they continue to argue about his age for a few minutes. Basically every single day. Oh brothers. Also we have no gone a full three years of Bennett's life without him every once calling Westin, Westin. Just Brother. "Brudder." I love it.

Camden:

feels like a much older baby since our trip since I put away his swing and bassinet and snuggle me pillow when we got home. He has moved into our closet and pack n play and goes to sleep awake now. I almost cried that first night. No other baby has ever slept in our bed so much or slept by me for so long. I just miss him during our busy days! But it's so freeing to put a baby down awake and let them fall asleep for a good nap in the same spot every day. It's going to make his sleeping on the go a little less easy but it's still way more time back overall. He's such a sweetheart!

The Infamous Road Trip of 2019

Three kids under four, one mom, 18 hours in the car.

It sounds precarious.

But we wanted to see the potential practices and cities that Michael is job searching in, and honestly I just need to shake up the routine sometimes before I go crazy. So we piled ourselves and all the things into our van, and drove to Cedar City and then Denver. Michael flew to Denver for a work conference, and then drove home with us from Denver to Fresno.

Highlights:

The boys were so good in the car. They never even asked to watch a show on our entire Fresno to Denver trip. We had a few moments of drama when we realized Westin couldn't hand Bennett snacks even after I moved his carseat to the middle row by Camden, but with a few precise throws I remedied that from the driver's seat. Bennett didn't even mind getting a string cheese to the face. In fact, we all cheered when Bennett got a string cheese to the face. Our car ran well, our drive days were smooth, life was good. Saturday morning was somber because I went to a funeral for a high school friend, but it was really sweet to see so many people that I haven't crossed paths with in so long -- I just wish it was under better circumstances. The rest of the day we spent playing with Ali and Matthias, eating at Brody's, and enjoying being together.

But then.

Sunday morning started with a scream when Westin saw a mouse in his room. We must have let it into my parents house when we were loading our stuff in from our car, because they have precautionary traps set at all times because they know I'm a freak about mice. And my dad had checked them right before we came (empty) and after the mouse sighting there were two in a trap. Oh man, my worst fear. Matthias luckily took care of the mouse Westin saw, and the traps stayed empty after that dramatic morning. My family is never going to let me forget my irrational moment when I thought a mouse had attacked Matthias. I'm not going to write the details of that here. Let's just leave that early morning drama behind us.

Annnnd move onto the church drama. I was peacefully sitting in Relief Society with a sweet sleeping Camden, when a nursery leader came and motioned for me. She was holding a little girl so I told her she wasn't mine. She kept motioning for me and I thought she was thinking I was the mom of this little girl since I was a visitor. But then she loudly whispered, "No, your little boy threw up!" So much for my week of fighting germs and thinking we were in the clear. I went to nursery, changed Bennett into extra clothes, put his church clothes in a big sandwich bag I had packed in my diaper bag last minute, sanitized all the workers hands, and cleaned up his throw up. Then took him home where he proceeded to throw up all day. We had an early Thanksgiving dinner planned with all my family that night, and everyone still came but I was so sad to see Bennett feeling so sick.

Then at about 8 that night, I knew I was next. Is it bad that I thought that at least my three pieces of Thanksgiving pie weren't going to do me any harm? Then began my night of throwing up, followed by my dad, followed by Ali, followed by Matthias. Followed my niece Lydia, which sent my brother's family racing back up north so they wouldn't be stuck in Cedar when this went through their family. Oh my goodness, you guys. My Cedar time had big plans of all my favorite things but we then spent the weekend being taken care of by my sweet mom who magically never got sick. She just handed out toast and gatorade and took my kids to the playground and brought me Camden when he needed to be nursed and just took care of us all so much. So grateful for her. Also amazed -- how did she not catch this evil sickness? Why did it take days for it to go from Westin to Bennett and then fly through the rest of us? So miserable.

At this point I was convinced I couldn't drive my kids to Denver and wanted to buy Michael a flight to Vegas and pick him up on my way home. But he said to hold off and see how I was feeling in a day, and after 24 hours I really was feeling way better. And I really wanted to see Denver and Fort Collins and have time with Katie and her cute boys. So, after setting up my mom's Christmas tree for a little Westin who wanted to so bad, we loaded up the car once again and prepped for an early morning drive. 

The drive from Cedar to Denver is different than the Fresno to Cedar drive I'm so used to, because there are stretches without services or cell service. So I had to plan my stops around that rather than around my baby, which felt so frustrating. Stopping when your baby is sleeping and both kids are happy feels super annoying. But, we made the drive in good time and got to Katie's around 6. Camden only cried our very last 30 minutes in traffic. We ate spaghetti with Katie, and Jack and Oliver were so cute -- cousin time is the best! I thought the worst was behind us.

But then.

At 3am I heard Bennett crying. I went in his room and he had thrown up again. I felt so, so, so bad for him and so bad for Katie. I thought we were in the clear, but we showed up in a sorry state. She was so sweet to help us out. After I gave Bennett a bath and we got everything cleaned up, we went to sleep for a little longer. The next day we went to go to the park and I started to get my stroller out of my car. Except my car keys were no where. I emptied every piece of luggage I had, retraced my steps countless time, even searched trash cans and toy boxes to see if a kid had misplaced them. Ryan called AAA thinking they were in my car, but after they unlocked it and I searched through, they weren't there either. At this point I was just feeling like this trip had beat me down good. Michael told me he started to worry every time he got a text from me, thinking "Oh man, what happened now..." It was rough.

Katie kindly sent me in her car to pick up Michael and head up to our Fort Collins appointments. She watched Bennett and Westin, and Camden came up north with us. We had a great day up there and it was so good to just see Michael again for the first time in a week. He had been in classes all day every day at his review course, but he stayed in the Brown Palace Hotel in downtown Denver. Without any nursing babies or throwing up toddlers. Our lives are such different kinds of work. But man we are both working hard. I'm glad one of us had some good sleep that week at least :)

The next day I took the boys to library story time and the park with Katie's nanny, and they had a blast. Then I took Westin to pick out a birthday present for Oliver and he was adamant that they needed the ice cream truck tent that he discovered. It was so cute to see how much he really wanted them to have that, especially since it was something I never would have looked twice at. We sang to Oliver that night and ate pizza and birthday cake, and poor Bennett was just quiet and sad on the couch the whole time. Luckily he didn't throw up anymore but he was sure not himself. Michael came to Katies late that night after his last class finished at 8. Westin was so excited to stay up late and drive with me to the train station to pick him up. When I put Bennett to bed that night I laid down by him for a minute and asked if he was still feeling pretty sick. While we were laying there I saw a tiny tip of a key poking out from under Westin's bed. My keys! I had gone out to my car at 3am the night before to get Bennett his sleeping bag after he threw up. When I came back in and made him a new bed and put him back to sleep and cleaned things up, my keys got pushed under Westin's bed in the shuffle. 

The next day we drove to Cedar, stopping in Grand Junction for some appointments there and to check out the city. Our drive day was pretty smooth and we rolled into Cedar around 8:00. The boys watched Toy Story on the drive and they were thrilled.

On Sunday we went to church, but I sent Michael home with Bennett during nursery because I just couldn't show our faces in there again. I'm pretty sure those sweet nursery workers had a rough week after helping with Bennett... oh man. Then that night we had a crepe night at my friend Kendra's house with some friends from high school. I think I went to high school with some of the greatest people, and I love catching up with them.

On Monday enjoyed some time with my parents, packed up the very full car, and had a slow morning. My dad was hit pretty hard by whatever hit us all and still isn't feeling well, so we just kept things easy. Then we drove as far as Vegas, visited the Naylors, and they kindly watched our kids while we went to another appointment. The next day we ate breakfast with them, checked out Bryan's dental practice, and then drove the rest of the way to Fresno. The boys watched three movies and ate all the snacks they wanted. We were so done at this point. We stopped in Bakersfield at Chick-fil-A, then made it the rest of the way home around 5. 

My sweet neighbor that was checking on Kitty for us had deep cleaned my kitchen and my guest bathroom. That was so, so kind of her and so unexpected. I just couldn't stop thinking about how sweet that was of her to do and how much I sincerely appreciated it. She texted me "I hope you don't mind that I cleaned for you -- I just remember what it's like to have little people around and no help. You are just never able to catch up, and I wanted to help." People are so, so kind.

So. That was the big road trip of 2019. I'm absolutely glad I went -- I would hate weighing the decisions we're weighing without meeting people and seeing cities that we're looking into. But oh my goodness there were some low points in this experience. But really, we were safe and things went well and we did it. Mice and germs and lost keys and hours on the road can't hold us down!

Well, they can. And they kind of did. But not completely :)

I stopped in this exact random spot once, in Boron, CA, on a drive from Fresno to Cedar.
Westin was newly potty trained, Bennett was tiny and nursing, and we stopped right here.
This time I nursed Camden while Westin and Bennett chased each other around the car.
It was kind of a surreal moment as I looked at how much has changed during our residency years. 

Baby Camden did so well! He never even cried from Fresno to Cedar.
Just let me know when he was hungry, and we stopped two times.

Then he got to take a good nap in Grandpa's arms.
No where better.

Going, going...

Gone.
The calm before the "your little boy just threw up!" storm.

Poor sweet Bennett.
He never even cried or whined. Just laid like this and sporadically threw up.

Julia was thrilled to meet Camden!
I'm so sad these cute cousins all got ripped off of their one day together (Monday)
because of germs. That made me so sad, since they don't see each other nearly enough.

Star on the tree! Westin was so excited.

My friend from high school was so sweet to bring his kids over with notes and otter pops for Bennett
after he threw up in nursery.

We do one gas station stop and one long park stop on our drive days.
This park in Grand Junction was really fun!

Jack and Bennett immediately dressed up together when we made it to Katie's.
Cousins are the best!

Oh looking way too big, sweet four-month-old boy!

Getting into that car. Still no keys to be found :(

Meanwhile, Michael lives here.

Making Oliver some birthday cards!
I love Westin's pictures and notes.

Learning some Spanish together!

Jack looooved holding baby Camden and gave him so much cute attention.
He's going to be such a good big brother to his little brother on the way!

Such a cool library!

No idea why Bennett wanted to face this way during all of story time, haha.

Michael's boy band shot from his week.
He had a good time with some air force guys.

Bennett loves pretending to be Camden. It's so funny.

My friend DaNae have boys four weeks apart, a few days apart,
and then these two had the exact same due date. They are 24 hours apart.
Who knew we'd be so good at family planning together.

Love her! Love these babies!
Her little Wren is the cutest little thing!

My cute healthy mom waiting for us to get back from a walk.
Seriously, how did she not get sick. Wonder woman.

The Naylors were blown away by how much my boys eat.
I hear that sooo much about my boys. I'm in for a life of making lots of food.

These kiddos are looking so big compared to when we were in Manchester Village with the Naylors!

Don't mind our straight out of bed selves, but we had to take a picture before we left!

So fun to see Bryan's practice!