Surviving

Well.... you can tell by the amount of pictures I took this week that it was pretty uneventful around here.

We have the winter/baby tied-down-blues. But we'll get back out in the world again.

The boys had Monday off so Michael took them to a butterfly garden an hour south, plus a Red Robin lunch on the way home. Asher and I stayed home and had some nice quiet house time together.

Walking or driving the boys to school is such a to do. If it's walking, it's three pairs of boots and coats and hats and gloves and back packs and masks, plus time the baby's feeding and bundle him up and get him situated in my carrier and then get him warm, then get me warm, then get us out the door for a snowy walk that normally takes me 6 minutes but with all kids in the snow takes me 17 one way. Camden refuses gloves or takes them off and then cries because his hands are cold and won't walk through the snow unless I'm holding his hand, and twice this week I didn't do my wrap quite right so I had to keep a hold on Asher in the wrap and couldn't hold Camden's hand very easily, then he fell down one day and wanted to be carried and it took us 25 minutes to walk home while I just repeatedly told him I couldn't. SOO then we drove on Friday and getting all of them in four car seats and out of 3 car seats when we get home feels just barely even easier. And once I'm done I time it all again for 3 hours later, then time it all again for 3 hours later, and it sounds like nothing if you haven't been there and it makes for the most ridiculous of days. I asked Westin if I could homeschool him for just the rest of first grade and he was 0% interested in that. I can't blame him, but I do think it sounds like such a better day and better use of time than what we're doing.

Asher hit two months yesterday! He has a doctor's appointment this week to see how he's growing, I have one this week to see how I'm healing, and honestly I think we could both be doing a better job at those... He still fits in the clothes we brought him home from the hospital in, which I've never had a baby stay that small for that long. And I feel like I am not healing well inside and I hope beyond hope that it's just a slow recovery and not a recovery that will need some assistance. I've been reading all about hernias this week and feeling so discouraged.

So, not an exciting week over here and not our brightest of times. We fight too much. We all feel antsy. We're tired of Covid. It feels like winter just started even though when Christmas ends is when you feel done with winter. We're not sleeping enough, we're not talking kindly enough, we're not enjoying each other as much as we should. Just the real talk over here. The salt in all these wounds was the night this week when a smoke alarm went off at 3 in the morning which then set off our main BLARING house alarm, which has gone off twice in its life, reminding us that the previous owners accidentally left us the wrong code for that alarm and we can't disarm it. So it was blaring for minutes, and miraculously none of our four boys woke up and it happened right in the middle of one of Asher's longest stretches of sleep. It reminded me of when the SWAT team woke me up during Westin's first long stretch of sleep in Manchester Village in Indiana, and Michael was so intrigued and invested in the neighbor situation and I was just bitter beyond belief that the SWAT team had to choose THAT NIGHT to involve themselves.

Sleep is important.

We need something to look forward to, which might be a Yellowstone trip but we're trying to figure out if the timing will work. We'll see. I just know we'll look back on this stretch and think "Oof, remember that..." and I don't want to label it all as that. I want to have better days with each other. Asher is the absolute sweetest and the brightest part of everything for me right now. His smiles really melt my heart, which is needed between what feels like constant nagging for help and pleading for quiet. :/

Here's to getting through January and February!

Camden was committed to this burger.

Tummy time has always been hated by all my kids.

I made zucchini baked oats this week and was obsessed with them.
Eating them each day was what I looked forward to on all my walks to school.
Put some almond creamer and fruit and peanut butter on there and it's dessert!

Bundled.

"I'm gonna make some pages for your next book!"
Haha sweet Bennett boy. We did his reading book together every day this week except Saturday and he's doing great.

Feeling this.

When you obviously didn't mix the batter enough....
Flat, semi-flat, and fluffy.
These "lactation" cookies are basically a less guilty feeling chocolate chip oatmeal cookie that I'm obsessed with right now.